Food Review: Dear diner, Don't touch my coffee!

Apparently all it takes to get service is man parts.

On Sunday I went to Blue Plate Diner with CBC and I had the best service from the wait staff there ever. Really, when I walked in by myself I waited about five minutes for the owner (who I blame Blue Plate's awful service on) to notice me and put my name on the list. Even though the line looked obscenely long, he said it would be about a 15 minute wait.

The second CBC shows up, we were seated on the patio. This never happens to me and the girls. We always wait forever to get our name on the list, then wait to be seated at an indoor table then wait another ten minutes for a server to ask us if we want coffee. Blue Plate is sexist or at least the wait staff seems more inclined to treat the men better than the ladies. That's it-I'm dressing in drag next time I go there. Maybe if I look like I belong on the wait staff, I won't have to wait.

I have very strong feelings about my coffee. What is with a server's need to put coffee in my cup every time they walk by? Coffee is a delicate balance of cream, sugar and coffee. Why are servers so intent on messing it up? I have it down to a science--one part sugar, two parts cream and three parts coffee. If a server adds coffee, they ruin the ratio. And my coffee is not the delicious sugary mess it was before.

I told my server three times, I didn't want her to add coffee to my cup. And every time she looked at me like I was crazy. What? I don't want you to ruin the deliciousness going on here, lady. Why would I knowingly let you corrupt my coffee? Geez. Maybe, I should explain the coffee ratios to her--that will totally help me sound less crazy.

Both CBC and I had the Blue Plate Breakfast, which is eggs, toast and hash browns. The eggs were fried just right and the toast was slathered with butter, which makes my tummy happy. But the hash browns? I just don't get it, Blue Plate.

I'm not sure why the fried potato chunks mixed with onions and bell peppers are even called hash browns. Breakfast fries would be more appropriate. Also they should come with a warning that they are unevenly cooked and the potatoes spend part of their life in a freezer without the onions and bell peppers. You will be able to taste the difference no matter how not-picky-about-potatoes-weird you are.

In the end, it was my best Blue Plate experience, which means they topped out at just above mediocre. There are still other breakfast places in town I like more. But I have a little more faith in this 50s-esque diner on 2100 South 2100 East as long as I bring my man parts.

Learn to fake it until you make it, honey!

Really, is it that hard to fake it?

After Ava, Erin and I went to Blue Plate Diner at 2100 South 2100 East, Ava sent me this link to Bad Service.Reading these stories made me feel an itty-bit better about our experience, but come on.

Blue Plate was so busy this Sunday afternoon we waited for a table. The wait wasn't too long, but it was a little weird to be asked to wait. The hostess (who I believe is the owner's wife) handed me three menus and asked us to follow our waitress to the back booth that had taken ten or so minutes to get cleaned after all we got to watch while we waited.

We followed Jasmine back and sat down. She wandered off then came back a few minutes later to ask what we wanted to drink. Her first words to us were, "What would you like to drink?" All three of us ordered coffee and water.

A few minutes later we all had water, but I had no coffee. Apparently, when I asked for coffee she didn't hear me. Now I pride myself on being a good customer. I've worked in the restaurant business and I always tip well. I really believe that if I treat my server well, they will treat me well. Obviously, Jasmine has a different ideology. I was bugged that I had to ask twice for coffee, but I tried to not make a big deal out of it.

Many minutes later (Erin had time to choose what she wanted even), Jasmine made her way back to take our order. No smiles, no helpful-ness just "What do you want?" Seriously, what happened to piss her off so much that she couldn't even pretend to be cheerful for the five seconds it takes to write down an order?!

Our food came out fairly quickly and was good. But in the hour or so we spent eating Jasmine checked on us once and another waitress refilled our coffee after Erin asked for more. The second waitress also managed to make a hugely inappropriate joke at the same time about not having enough coffee for Ava.

Awesome! Because when you have a table of three unhappy people making a joke about not seeing we need something is golden.

I've eaten at Blue Plate often enough to know that this level of terrible service is most likely a fluke. But I'm upset enough by the experience that next time I want breakfast in the afternoon I'll go to the Park Cafe or try Finn's on 1700 South. Sorry, Blue Plate you gotta earn my love.

Utah's Best Breakfast

Erin, Laura, Ava and I went to the Blue Plate Diner for dinner. It was another brinner experience for me on the patio at 2100 South 2100 East. For the past ten years or so, this place has won City Weekly's Best Breakfast Award. The diner was also featured on Food Network's Diners, Drive-Ins and Drivers not too long ago.

Even though it was just a little too cool, we sat on the patio. Our waitress was helpful and friendly, plus she had a couple of awesome tattoos.

I tried their biscuits and country gravy. The only downside was having to ask for more gravy. Come on, I want to die of a grease and sodium induced heart attack people! Give me more gravy. The biscuits were big and fluffy--much better than my sad attempts. The gravy was yummy, too. It had nice big chunks of sausage and was thick and flavorful. The home fries were better this time than before. I think there was more onion and green pepper.

Ava had the turkey avocado sandwich. She liked it well enough to take the extras home. I tried some of her steak fries. They were pretty good, but as Ava says the fry sauce could be better.

Erin tried the corned beef and hash dish the Blue Plate is famous for. She said it was good. It looked and smelled so delicious I might just try corned beef next time I'm there.

Laura had the tuna melt sandwich. I suspect this is one of her favorite things from Blue Plate. She seemed to enjoy her dinner, too. She ordered the shoestring fries instead of the steak fries. They looked great and would probably be my choice from their fry options.

In the end, Erin was nice enough to pick up the check. So I'm not sure how much it was, but I know each of our meals cost under $10. It's definitely worth the price for the fun vibe and delicious diner food.

Blue Plate Diner

First, I want to apologize for making the faithful few wait an extra day for this. Second, can we start eating out more often? Maybe, I should make some more friends, jeez. (If you don't know why that's funny send me an email and we'll go to dinner.)

Now, on to the review.

Blue Plate Diner

Guy Fieri of Food Network recently visited this joint to feature it on his "Diners, Drive-In's and Dives." Guy goes to tons of places all around the country and it's about time he stopped in Salt Lake City, and there is no question why he chose this diner: the decor.

Blue Plate has a great vibe. Johnny Cash and Elvis memorabilia make the 1950's juke box look right a home. Post cards from around the world are strung up all around the diner to make anyone visiting from anywhere feel comfortable. The patio is painted so brightly it instantly makes you smile. This is a diner straight from the owner's soul and the decor doesn't apologize.

The service was okay. We were there around 9 p.m., so I was happy they would seat us. The waitress was young and seemed a little inexperienced. She was very friendly and kind. In a couple years, she'll be an excellent waitress.

This City Weekly Best Breakfast Winner, didn't woo me with their food. The home fries were burnt and greasy. Yes, there is actually something that is too greasy for me. I know, I was surprised.

On the other side of the plate, the omelet I ordered was cooked to perfection. The egg was perfectly done, the veggies were crisp and tender. The avocado garnish was fresh and delicious.

Blue Plate will cost you between $5 and $10 a plate. They serve breakfast all day and have an extensive menu. Although, Blue Plate isn't enough of a favorite for me to go regularly it is definitely worth the 1950-esque experience at least once. So if you haven't been, get on over to 2100 South and 2100 East and try some breakfast!