Alcohol Review: Beer buzzes in Utah

So apparently there's this guy Dell Vance who really likes Utah and beer. I think we're soul mates. He opened the Beerhive Pub on 128 South Main Street in Downtown to share his favorite things with me.

Okay, maybe it's not all for me, but I'm going to pretend it is. I love this little place. The upstairs is comfortable and clean. There's also a nice mix of browns, reds and light in the decor. Seriously, a bar where you can see the people around you...amazing.

I visited the Beerhive with Patrick, Ava and Erin last weekend and it was a vast improvement over our first bar of choice the Green Pig. The vibe at the Beerhive is comfortable. It manages to feel like a bar where it's okay for the ladies to hang out by themselves without getting creepy comments and/or stares from the men who are also hanging out by themselves.

The beer menu is impressive with over 100 choices. I saw lots of beers I wanted to try, but in efforts to pay off my credit card I stuck with the cheap, local, on-tap brews and had some Uinta Cutthroat. (I'm down to the last credit card, people!)

We met some of Patrick's friends who were really cool and tried lots of tasty beers. All in all it made for a great night with a great server who was adorable, on top of things and fun.

Also I hear tell the food menu comes from Vienna Bistro and is made of Austrian goodness by their chef Frody Volgger so next time I head to the 'hive I'll have to try out some wiener schnitzel.

The photos come from City Weekly and SLCLunches.

Food Review: Turning the tide on my favorite sushi

Ava and I made a visit to Tsunami in Sugar House this past week. She was craving sushi and I just like to eat.

Since our favorite sushi spot, Sapporo shut down we decided to return to another old favorite and made our way to the little place by the dollar theater. I should mention Tsuanmi is open until 10 p.m. on weeknights. Yes, Salters there is a place you can get a great dinner after 9 p.m. on a week night in the Salty City.

Ava chose to sit at a table, not the sushi bar. This made me happy because I find the sushi chefs rude and condescending-for some reason they don't seem to like it when I ask questions about fish. It turns out the table was a good choice as the sushi chefs spent much of the night arguing back and forth and writing the schedule with the manager.

I ordered the Tokyo Cowboy roll and Ava had the Malibu, then I ordered a veggie roll called Catalina.

The Tokyo wasn't as good as I remembered, it seemed a little bit spicier without the lovely balance of sweet and spicy my taste buds remember.

Ava liked the Malibu, but said she'll probably order something else next time. The Malibu had eel and was pretty tasty, but I wasn't a fan of the overall texture of the roll--it was just a little too smooth and slimy for me.

The Catalina had lots of delicious vegetables wrapped in soy paper. The weird part was that it tasted like peanuts only without peanuts. It wasn't bad, just unexpected. Even Ava who hates nuts ate some of the roll.

Our waitress was adorable and very helpful. So I'm taking back the sitting at the bar rule for sushi and amending it to say, "At Tsunami sit at a table and let the waitress deal with the sushi chef."

Food Review: Fry sauce ruins Millie's fries?

So after taking the week off, I guess we have some catching up to do.

First on the list of places I've been and you get to know about is Millie's Burgers on 2100 South in Sugar House.

I love this little 50s style hamburger shack that's just a short walk from my house. CBC and I went there for some burgers, fries and an introduction to that Utah wonder-fry sauce.

The Millie Burger was just as good as I remember--a quarter-pound of beef with cheese, pickles and fry sauce. Even though the burger was too big for me to finish, I was sad to see it go.

The fries were fresh, crispy and salty decliousness just waiting to be eaten. I think next time, I'll order to go and mix up some of my own fry sauce at home. They just don't seem to realize what a disservice it is to their fries to serve them with overly ketchuped fry sauce.

I warned CBC Millie's fry sauce is serviceable, but not the best ketchup-mayonnaise mixture in Utah. But he was brave and tried out the sauce, I don't think he liked it because the rest of the fry sauce was left for me.

As always the teenagers at Millie's were more than helpful. We had a very nice time in the cinder block restaurant with orange plastic tables. And the whole four other customers who were there at 9 p.m. on a Thursday night seemed to enjoy themselves, too.

Food Review: Fat's Revisited

I like beer.

I don't like people.

So a place like Fat's, is easy for me to love.

As far as I can tell they keep a bartender, waitress and cook on staff at all times. An amazing waitress! I love the woman who works at Fat's. She is amazing! I have never once not had an amazing experience at Fat's. The wait staff deftly handles the most obnoxious customer, while still managing to do their job exceptionally well.

The tables are never full and pool is the big draw for most of the men there. Also, it seems kind of coupley as in guys like to take women there and "teach" them pool. I say "teach" because my observation skills tell me if this isn't an excuse for groping, it's an excuse for showing off a largely unnecessary life skill.

I love Fat's nachos because I love cheese. The nachos are served with an awesome salsa with corn so it's this great combination of sweet and spicy. The nachos are a giant serving with tons of sour cream, onions and olives and just a teensy little bit of tomatoes (they could totally up that on the plate).

They only have six beers on tap so I always end up getting Uinta's Golden Spike Hefeweizen, but they do offer a few different bottles as well. The Golden Spike is decent, and definitely helped by the slice of lemon Fat's serves on the side.

Fat's is a great, quiet bar where it's easy to feel comfortable gorging on grease while drinking a beer.

Food Review: Dear diner, Don't touch my coffee!

Apparently all it takes to get service is man parts.

On Sunday I went to Blue Plate Diner with CBC and I had the best service from the wait staff there ever. Really, when I walked in by myself I waited about five minutes for the owner (who I blame Blue Plate's awful service on) to notice me and put my name on the list. Even though the line looked obscenely long, he said it would be about a 15 minute wait.

The second CBC shows up, we were seated on the patio. This never happens to me and the girls. We always wait forever to get our name on the list, then wait to be seated at an indoor table then wait another ten minutes for a server to ask us if we want coffee. Blue Plate is sexist or at least the wait staff seems more inclined to treat the men better than the ladies. That's it-I'm dressing in drag next time I go there. Maybe if I look like I belong on the wait staff, I won't have to wait.

I have very strong feelings about my coffee. What is with a server's need to put coffee in my cup every time they walk by? Coffee is a delicate balance of cream, sugar and coffee. Why are servers so intent on messing it up? I have it down to a science--one part sugar, two parts cream and three parts coffee. If a server adds coffee, they ruin the ratio. And my coffee is not the delicious sugary mess it was before.

I told my server three times, I didn't want her to add coffee to my cup. And every time she looked at me like I was crazy. What? I don't want you to ruin the deliciousness going on here, lady. Why would I knowingly let you corrupt my coffee? Geez. Maybe, I should explain the coffee ratios to her--that will totally help me sound less crazy.

Both CBC and I had the Blue Plate Breakfast, which is eggs, toast and hash browns. The eggs were fried just right and the toast was slathered with butter, which makes my tummy happy. But the hash browns? I just don't get it, Blue Plate.

I'm not sure why the fried potato chunks mixed with onions and bell peppers are even called hash browns. Breakfast fries would be more appropriate. Also they should come with a warning that they are unevenly cooked and the potatoes spend part of their life in a freezer without the onions and bell peppers. You will be able to taste the difference no matter how not-picky-about-potatoes-weird you are.

In the end, it was my best Blue Plate experience, which means they topped out at just above mediocre. There are still other breakfast places in town I like more. But I have a little more faith in this 50s-esque diner on 2100 South 2100 East as long as I bring my man parts.

Food Recipe: Tamales

As per Rikki's request, courtesy of Amber.

Slow Cooker Mexican Style Meat

The yummy stuff for inside the tamale.

2-3 lbs. Pork roast (we used a butt roast and 4 lbs.)

1 teaspoon salt

1 teaspoon ground black pepper

2 tablespoons olive oil

1 large onion chopped

1 and 1/4 cups diced green chilie pepper

1 teaspoon chili powder

1 teaspoon cayenne pepper

1 teaspoon garlic powder

hot pepper sauce

Add everything to crock pot and let cook over night -- you could also let it simmer covered on the stove. When the pork is done, use two forks to shred it into small pieces. Later, we'll wrap the shredded pork in the masa and corn husks to make a tamale.

After you shred the pork, this is a good time to crumble Mexican cheese (queso) and slice canned jalapenos. Of course, you should experiment and use what you like for inside your tamale.

Masa

The delicious corn mixture surrounding the shredded pork, cheese and peppers.

2 cups Masa Mix (tan bag)

1 teaspoon chicken stock granules

1 teaspoon baking powder

1 tablespoon New Mexico Chili Powder

1 tablespoon California or Colorado Chili Powder

3/4 cup lard (blue box)

2 cups warm water

Add dry ingredients to the bowl and mix until well-blended. Add lard and cut into the dry mix--like you do for pie crust.

Add 1 cup warm water and mix by hand; add additional warm water to reach the right consistency as needed--with a double batch I add a little over 3 cups warm water. Do not make more than a double batch of the masa at a time.

Assemble tamales

The most time consuming step.

1 package dry corn husks (about 70 husks)

35-feet kitchen twine, cut into 6-inch pieces

Soak the corn husks in warm water for at least 15 minutes.

Roll a small of masa in your hands until it's the size of a fat thumb. Place the masa roll on a single corn husk (about 12 inches square). Smash out the masa until it is a 3 to 4 inch circle about a half inch thick.

In the middle of the masa circle, place a tablespoon of shredded meat, a pinch of crumbled queso and a canned and sliced jalapeno. You can use different mix-ins if you like.

Now pat out a smaller circle of masa (about the size of a quarter), place it on top of the meat, cheese and jalapeno. Use your fingers to stretch the masa out so the meat, cheese and jalapeno are completely covered.

Next use your burrito wrapping skills to fold in the sides of the corn husk. You want the masa to seal at the edges so none of the meat, cheese or jalapeno is poking out. Lay the sides of the corn husk back down and flat.

Pull the bottom of the corn husk up, over the top of the masa, gently pul the corn husk down until the masa feels tight. Then pull the sides of the corn husk back over the masa, wrapping it like a present.

Now use the kitchen twine to tie the top of the masa like a small purse. (They should look like the ones in the photo.)

Steam

Using a pot of boiling water, a colander and a lid steam the wrapped tamales for 15-20 minutes depending on size.

Remove from the colander using tongs.

Let cool. Enjoy!

Tamales is an all day process and shouldn't be taken lightly. If you are serious about making tamales give yourself plenty of time and space. Good luck!